Stuttgart Stunner

Julia Goerges: Beauty Uber Alles


Drop-dead Goerges: Her game is like her name

STUTTGART, Germany (April 24, 2010) – Julia Goerges is my new favorite female tennis player. The 22-year-old German native of Bad Oldesloe is also probably the most *Goergeous* woman currently bouncing around the WTA circuit - a statuesque 6-footer with slender long legs and - an anomaly in the women's game (outside of Serena Williams, Nicole Vaidosova, Caroline Wozniacki and perhaps handful of others) - a curvaceous female athlete actually built like a woman: that is to say, she has a rack! (Think about it: when's the last time you saw a top female tennis player that actually needed to wear a sports bra? I have a short list of candidates - see "The All England Rack-It Club" - but only a scant few are also top-heavy in the WTA rankings.) Facially, she reminds me of a cross between actresses Jill Hennessy and Sandra Bullock.

And on April 24th, this 32nd-ranked outsider "stunned" world No. 1 Caroline Wozniacki 7-6 (7-3), 6-3 in the Stuttgart WTA claycourt final to win her first title of the year in front of an ecstatic home crowd. I put "stunned" in quotes because, cute and loveable and media-friendly as the Dane darling is, I've always seen her as a pretender and not a true contender for the throne of women's tennis - she's a counterpuncher who's pretty good in all aspects of the game without any one go-to weapon in her arsenal that's a knockout punch. And she's still never won a Grand Slam event. (I rest my case.) Now, Julia Goerges has a similar all-around game, and is not exactly fleet of foot (she's carrying around that extra real estate uptown, after all), but at 6-feet tall, her kick-serve is a force to be reckoned with. Let's hope she carries on her current excellent form to even bigger accomplishments as the 2011 French Open (where Julia lost to Serena Williams in the second round last year) nears!

Tennis Is Looking Up, Down Under

2010 Australian Open Early Round Round-up

The only thing that keeps me from getting depressed thinking about my upcoming birthday at the end of this month (my own little variant of Seasonal Anxiety Disorder) is...the first Grand Slam tennis event of the year! Here are some random thoughts about the first week's matches...

Justine Is Back, Ready to Slam!


Back for one more at the Aussie Open

She'll never be as popular as her countrywoman - and fellow un-retiree - Kim Clijsters , and she's always been too-tightly wrapped (each match seems to present an existential crisis), but Justine Henin is my favorite female tennis player and I'm glad she's back in her first Grand Slam, and only her second tournament (she lost that first tournament to Clijsters two weeks ago in Brisbane in three tight sets - after blowing match points in the second set), since retiring from the game 18 months ago. That's good for the game of tennis, as the women's pro tour needs the competition. In what commentator Chris Fowler called "perhaps the greatest second-round match in Grand Slam history," Henin met #5 Elena Dementieva, who was fresh over a big win over Serena Williams. But everyone knew how this one was gonna play out (was there ever any doubt?). Brad Gilbert nailed it best when he predicted Dementieva would get a big case of "the wobblies" (big game jitters) against an opponent who owned her on tour and the long-legged Russian went down in straight sets to her nemesis, 7-5, 7-6 (8-6).


Not Fade Away: Henin with another put-away

Dementieva was magnanimous and gracious in defeat, heaping praise on the player who hung another defeat at a major on her.

"She’s a great player,” Dementieva said afterwards, adding that it was like the petite Belgian had never left the game. "Playing against her, you really can learn a lot and improve your game. We really need these kind of players to increase the level of the game. So it’s great to have her back here on the tour.”


Dementieva: At a loss at what to do with Henin

Henin now has a 10-2 record against Dementieva, whose serve Justine broke on seven of 15 opportunities. Big wobblies indeed...

Serb and Folly


Ivanovich's ball toss form has really gone south

And speaking of poor serving, Martina Navratilova was spot-on when she pointed out the gist of former World No. 1 (ever-so-briefly), Ana Ivanovich's problems since her breakthrough year in 2008 when when she won the French Open and reached the Australian Open final. In a nutshell: She's lost her serve and hence her nerve. "Everything flows from the serve," Martina commented. "When your lose confidence in being able to hold serve, everything else follows." Ivanovic was able to get by her athletic but out-classed opponent, Shenay Perry, in straight sets (6-2, 6-3) - but don't count on her advancing too far with a serving game that is starting to resemble Dementieva's iffy form from a few years back. Navratilova quite rightly noted that Ana's serving woes all stemmed from a technical breakdown in her erratic ball toss - a technical deficiency that is also plaguing another former World #1, Maria Sharapova. Speaking of which...

Q: How Do You Solve a Problem Like Maria? A: Beat Her!

I'm so glad 2008 Australian Open champ Maria Sharapova lost in the first round to her fellow-22-year-old, fellow-Roosk, fellow-Maria: Maria Kirilenko. For one thing, there was no way I could stomach Sharapova's hideous Creature from the Black Lagoon seaweed ensemble (shown below):


Sharapova as Seaweed Sally

I'm sick of these tennis stars with their sideshow fashion lines trying to pimp their game like it's red carpet time at the Oscars. Tennis players are paid to play tennis and their fans pay to watch them play tennis. If I wanna look at gear, I'll switch over to Sundance Channel's Full-Frontal Fashion show or dig out my Goth fetish mags.

My ears are also delighted that Sharapova lost, as her screeching has gotten really annoying. Unfortunately, her audio aura is never far from mind thanks to the presence of fellow Rooskie grunter Victoria Azarenka, who like Kirilenko advanced to the second round. (Click here to see a list of the Top 10 Grunters on the Women's Tour - half of whom are Russian or Belarussian - courtesy of the UK Telegraph)


Kirilenko says "Shush" to her compatriot

Another bonus to Sharapova's early exit is that it stops cold all those lazy network broadcasters like Dick "Shoulda Retired Years Ago" Enberg who babble on endlessly about her beauty and fashion sense, neither of which are justified. Sharapova strikes me as a charming personality, but when people talk about her a babe I gotta set the record straight: she's an albatross. (And certainly carries one around her neck since her shoulder injury.) Check out her 6-2 wingspan, with those wide-axle shoulders that only an ox would envy.

If you want babe-age, look no further than her first round opponent, the very-fit, very lovely world #58, Maria Kirilenko (who as a teen won a 2004 doubles title with Sharapova in Birmingham, England).


Maria Kirilenko: The Total Babe Package

Boy howdy! And the Moscow beauty turns 23 next week, which makes her a fellow Aquarian like me (albeit with decades of age difference!). Check out her official web site: www.mkirilenko.com.

Oooo-Ooooo...Oudin!


Melanie Oudin: All over but the shouting (and the finish)

Of course, another unimaginative broadcasters' fave is America's Sweetheart, world #49 Melanie Oudin, whose 15 minutes of fame expired long ago. All that blabbering about her "Heartbeat of America" pluck and Norman Rockwell spirit. Bollocks! She's still a kid and still learning the game. She got lucky last year beating some Russians whose rankings were perhaps a little over inflated to begin with (including a rehabbing Sharapova who is still not 100% and two notorious big-game chokers in Petrova and Dementieva). Anybody see Oudin in Fed Cup action in 2009? She went 1-3, needing three sets to defeat an Argentine with a world ranking of #132 (Betima Jozami) while losing to Agentina's #36 Gisela Dulko and Italy's #18 Franesca Schiavone and, in the final, #12 Flavia Pennetta. Yet she won the Fed Cup's BNP Paribas Heart Award. Pathetic - pure hype. Let's move on, shall we? I get the feeling the Great American Hopeful is just the female Donald Young. Oh, by the way, she lost in the first round to #91-ranked Russian (they're everywhere!) Alla Kudryavtseva, 2-6, 7-5, 7-5.

The Bitch Is Back


Serena says: "Feets don't fail me now!"

It's still Serena Williams tournament to lose (unless the resurgent Belgians, Henin or Clijsters, can stop her - or the very sharp-looking, very hungry world #3 Svetlana Kuznetsova, who twice has lost in the finals here - both times to Justine Henin) but Serena's already lost the sexism argument. When asked by a broadcaster about her U.S. Open final implosion last September, Serena claimed that the whole thing was blown out of proportion because she was a woman and that she would not have been penalized $92,000 for threatening the female linesperson if she was a man. WTF??? (What The Foot-fault???) Where did that conspiracy theory come from? Johnny Mac, Nasty, and Connors on their worst days never threatened a referee or linesperson like Serena did. Even Darren Cahill pipped that he thought she got off pretty lucky with not getting suspended for her U.S. Open doubles final with sister Venus the next day, pointing out that in any other sport (certainly in soccer of baseball) such behavior would have merited an automatic suspension. Serena does her best talking on the court, not off it. Play on, Serena - and watch your feet (and your mouth - it goes without saying!).

Now, I haven't caught much of the men's action, though I saw that Roger Federer had a pretty tough first-round draw against Maria Kirilenko's big-serving pal, world #37 Igor Andreev. Roger Federer had never faltered in an opening match of a major played on a hard-court surface, but he was pushed and pushed hard by Iggy. If the Henin-Dementieva match was the perhaps the toughest second round clash in Grand Slam history, you could make an argument on the men's side for this first-round match (no to mention that five-set second-rounder between Juan Martin Del Potro and James Blake). Don't forget, Andreev has a history of giving Federer a difficult time, having pushed Federer to a five-setter in the fourth round two years ago at the U.S Open. As Federer knows from last year's Wimbledon final, any time you go up against a big server, there's a chance for an upset...

And speaking of big servers, the only full match I've seen so far was Andy Roddick's first rounder against The Boy from Brazil...

Give A-Rod A Hand - But Just One!


Hands-off: A-Rod learns less is more

I'm no Andy Roddick fan, as I've always thought he was a hot-headed one-trick pony in dire need of some humility, but I think he's gotten some following his spirit-crushing defeat to Roger Federer (who else?) in last year's Wimbleton final (the match of the year and an all-time classic, as far as I'm concerned). His work ethic has never been questioned (you don't stay in the Top 10 and win at least one title a year for 10 consecutive years without being dedicated to your work!) but now he's playing really well since he's added a one-handed slice backhand to his game. In his straight-set win over young Brazilian Tomaz Bellucci, he used it almost exclusively (I don't recall seeing more than one or two two-handed backhands the entire match). As the Zen saying goes, A-Rod's new shot is the equivalent of one hand clapping.

A-Rod's backhand was always his weak spot, but since he added the slice it's become, dare I say, a weapon. No, he doesn't hit winners with it, but uses it to set up points. Another two-hander, Raphael Nadal, has similarly added the one-handed slice backhand to his ever-expanding arsenal, with similar results - as has Novak Djokovic. It may mean these players have to play additional shots instead of going for outright winners on the backhand, but that's what constructing points and strategy is all about. Just ask Roger Federer on that score!

Ok, back to watching some more late-night tennis...

Another "Oh My" Moment for Dick Enberg

When is a Dick an Ass? When he's an Enberg.



2009 U.S. Open tennis winner Juan Martin Del Potro got a trophy, $2 million dollars and a Lexus, but all he really wanted to do was say a few words in Spanish.

Once again, Dick "Oh My!" Enberg has lived up to his name by squeezing the air out of big broadcasting moments and begging the question: why don't you retire and leave the airwaves to the competent? As a sports commentator for CBS Sports, 74-year-old Dick Enberg has stayed too long at the fair and should be put to pasture. All he can add are the usual bromides about the obvious stars, though even then he manages to mangle their names, tennis being an international sport and Enberg being the lazy and embarrassing embodiment of The Ugly American aesthetic. Remember Enberg's gaffe at the 2007 U.S. Open when he called Justine Henin - who was so shattered by a messy divorce settlement earlier in the year that she withdrew from the Australian Open - by her married name of Henin-Hardenne during the trophy presentation? But hey, as Shakespeare pondered, what's in a name, right?



And as far as international relations go, who cares if these award ceremonies - with the exception of the French Open (God bless the French!) - are by defacto conducted in English. Is that a problem, we monolingual Yanks ask? (Made me think of that Curb Your Enthusiasm episode in which a clueless Larry David mistakes the Norwegian golf pro for a Swede: "Swedish, Norwegian - what's the difference anyway?" to which Sven angrily retorts "Language, history, culture!") U.S. Open Women's Singles Runnerup Caroline Wozniacki conducted her post-match interview in English, Danish, and Polish. Federer speaks at least four laanguages fluently, and even Nadal has gotten savvy enough with his Spanglish to talk to the American press. But with the exception of soccer star Landon Donovan and Lakers star Kobe Bryant, I've never seen an American sports figure conduct an interview in a foreign language.

But I digress (as I usually do)...my point is, we're lucky that so many international sports figures - many of whom have bypassed school to turn pro at an early age - can speak English. But it is their second language at best. So during their Taylor Swift moment of glory in the spotlight, let them express themselves in their native language if they want. And don't first refuse and then grudgingly let them speak "quickly" as Dick Enberg did on Monday night. As Progressive pitchwoman Flo would say, "That's cold!"

What am I talking about? I'm talking about the U.S. Open trophy (or rather atrophied) ceremonies Monday night following world No. 6 Juan Martin Del Potro's exciting five set victory over five-time defending champion Roger Federer when Enberg brusquely brushed off Del Potro's request to say a few words in Spanish like the teary-eyed 20-year-old Argentine wunderkid was a panhandler asking for bus fare.



Del Potro's Spanish address prompted a huge ovation from the crowd (which included many Argentines in their national soccer jerseys and waving flags) and brought tears to his eyes. It was a big moment of national pride - one that Argentina needs in a year in which their soccer team is struggling to qualify for the World Cup.

I'm glad that I'm not the only one to criticize Enberg and CBS for the awkwardness of the trophy presentation ceremnonies. I agree with the viewer who wrote the following complaint to the U.S. Open officials, one that perfectly illustrates how demeaning this dis was to Del Potro:

Dear Sir/Madam,

I wish to register a very strong complaint about the US Open telecast last night - in particular, about your hosts’ behaviour at the presentation ceremony.

Juan Martin del Potro had just won his first major, defeating his idol in the final, and he wanted to address his friends and family in his native language - I don’t understand Spanish, but it was clearly something that meant a lot and was a very emotional moment for him.

It was most disrespectful and extremely crass of Dick Enberg to deny del Potro his moment by first declining outright his very polite request, and then later granting it only after being extremely condescending (”Quickly.”). I don’t know whether it was him personally, or whether someone from CBS was in his ear telling him to finish it quickly, but how can anyone possibly promote, defend or excuse such behaviour? In addition, the pathetic excuse given was a lack of time - but there was obviously enough time to tell del Potro that he was getting a nice Lexus (and making a pitch for the product at the same time)!! I am sure that Mr. Del Potro would have greatly preferred to speak to his people instead of being told what wonderful prizes he was getting for winning.

Again, I am dismayed by the great disrespect shown to a worthy champion in favour of appeasing corporate sponsors and/or pursuing the regularly scheduled programmes, and hence I am of the opinion that Juan Martin del Potro is owed an official apology from CBS and Mr. Enberg

And a blogger named YoungGuns added:

During tonights US Open award ceremony Dick Enberg did a couple things that were more disrespectful than what Kanye West did last night. What Kanye did was a classless thing to do and whether or not he was drunk (which I believe he was) it was something that no entertainer should do to another.

What Dick Enberg did did is much worse however. Dick decided to treat Roger Federer like the winner of the tournament while Del Potro was treated like an aftershow. He allowed Federer more time at the mic and made many references to the past championships rather than the one at hand. To top things off he orginally did not allow Del Potro to speak in his native tongue to his fellow countrymen after the English interview stating that they were running out of time and needed to get on with the ceremony. Only after a little convincing did he allow the rebuffed and crestfallen Del Potro to speak "a few quick words in Spanish."

His U.S. Open quips won't make this edition

Naturally the suits at CBS defended Enberg and said he was only doing his job. As the National Post wrote, "Enberg's bosses were probably screaming in his earpiece to move quickly to get back-to-back episodes of How I Met Your Mother — reruns, no less — on the air." But as a supposed lover of the game of tennis, Enberg surely must know that regardless of the corporate vultures for whom he shills, there is the Sportscasting Moment that can never be replayed. This was it, this was Del Potro's moment, and Enberg the Company Man sided with the filthy lucre over The Beautiful Game. Swing and a miss, Dick. Again.

Related Links:
Can I Speak in Spanish? (NY Times)
Angry reaction to host who refused to let Del Potro speak in Spanish (Buenos Aires Herald)

Federer Doesn't Give a Shit!

And That's OK!


"It's not the end of the world"

Although I was initially sad that my man Roger Federer lost last night's U.S. Open final to Juan Martin Del Potro after five mentally and physically draining sets (6-3, 6-7, 6-4, 6-7, 2-6,), upon reflection it made me appreciate the man and the athlete - and his accomplishments - even more. Federer made the finals of all four Grand Slams this year - for the unprecedented third time in his career! (2006, 2007, 2009) - and three of them went to five sets - five-set defeats at the Australian (to Nadal) and U.S. Open (to Del Potro) bookending the year, and a miraculous five-set tuff-it-out win over Andy Roddick (playing the Game of His Life) at Wimbledon being even more impressive to me than his French Open straight sets win over Robin Soderling (who in tennis terms became "The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance" for his upset dethroning of the King of Clay, Rafa Nadal) that gave him his career Grand Slam, broke his perennial run as Nadal's runnerup at Roland Garros, and reminded people once again that he was the Second Greatest Clay Court Player of his generation (a fact lost amidst all the "All-Time Greatest Player" talk). This was Roger's seventh consecutive Grand Slam final. He's appeared in a record 21 Grand Slam finals, winning 15 of them (but this was his first loss to someone not named Nadal). He had won 40 consecutive matches at Flushing Meadows. He had won 33 of his previous 34 Grand Slam matches. And he has made the final at 17 of the last 18 Grand Slam tournaments. And serving for the match at 5-4, 30-love, he was two points away from his 16th Slam.

He gave it his all, but at the end of the day maybe he just wasn't that hungry for it after all those accomplishments.

"Can't have them all," he said afterwards.

Federer's very competitive but even champions need their motivation recharged. I mean, even adult film star Johnny "Wadd" Holmes, after sleeping with over 1,000 women, must have reached a point where he found it hard to "erect the architecture of success" (if ya know what I mean, and I think ya do) at the sight of yet another nekkid babe. In other words, Federer's been there, done that (done it it all, in fact), and has no real hurtles to jump. As New Jersey Sports pointed out in its excellent "Grading the U.S. Open" review, "He's at a crossroads, really. There's no barriers left. He's conquered history and ruled the game for a while..." And let's face it, Roger's quip before the final that it would ne nice to win his first major as a Dad seemed a stretch even for him (the "First Dad To Win a Grand Slam" distinction isn't really a much coveted or sought-after goal on the men's tennis tour). Hardly a die-hard motivation, like beating Nadal at the French. But that's OK.

Tennis Superman Starting to Show He's All Too Human

Just as we get less tolerant as we age and let our true feelings be known (because we don't care what people think when we're running out of time and don't have anything to lose), Roger's starting to loosen up, show more emotion, show some human frailty, and let it all hang out - for better or worse. Witness him tossing a racket in a match earlier this year and then his heated expletive-not-deleted exchange with the chair umpire during the final when Juan Martin Del Potro was allowed to challenge a call after a lengthy period of time. Federer had already headed to his chair where, seated, he argued "I wasn't allowed to challenge after two seconds. The guy takes like 10 every time. Don't you have any rules?"

When the umpire told Federer to be quiet, the usually overly polite and gentlemanly champion took umbrage: Stop showing me the hand, OK? Don't tell me to be quiet, OK? When I want to talk I'll talk, all right...I don't give a shit what he said, OK? I just say he waited too long. Don't fucking tell me the rules. I was not allowed to challenge..."



Opening Up at the U.S. Open

I like it. It's controlled petulance and it makes it easier for us mere mortals to relate to The Living Legend. In this regard, perhaps only this regard, he is just like us. I'm actually finding the runner-up Federer to be a much more interesting and complex character than Roger the unassailable King. It may just keep him hungry instead of being merely sated once again, sitting at the head of the banquet table. Now he not only has Nadal chowing down at the fete, but now a giant of a giant-slayer in Del Potro (who also seems to have Nadal's number) - not to mention Andy Murray, Djokovic, and other would-be spoilers in the ever-competitive Top 10.

Back to New Jersey Sports' and their spot-on question of the hour about the man already called The Greatest Tennis Player Ever: "Can he keep himself motivated enough to maintain his place? The talent is there. But he needs to respond better when players punch him in the mouth. He rallied past Andy Roddick at Wimbledon, but couldn't conjure up the same spirit in the final against del Potro. Now that all the barriers are gone, will Federer keep his form up?"

So far, the form's there. But maybe there's just that little suggestion of, "Well, it's not so bad if I let this one slip away" lurking in deepest recesses of his will. Don't forget, back in August at the Montreal Masters, Roger inexplicably let a 5-1 third-set lead against Jo-Wilfried Tsongo slip away to lose his quarterfinal match 7-6, 1-6, 7-6. "I never should have allowed it," Roger said afterwards. "But it did happen."

We're all waiting to see what happens with Roger Federer from this point on. To see if he really doesn't give a shit, as he told that chair umpire. Or if he can rekindle the kind of competitive fire that saw him break down in tears after Nadal defeated him at this year's Australian Open final. Either way is OK, Roger; you've more than earned your place in tennis history. I'm just curious how this drama is going to play out.

Love Comes In Sports

Love comes in spurts, in dangerous flirts
And it murders your heart, they never tell you that part
- Richard Hell, "Love Comes in Spurts"

I spent all Saturday night watching Curb Your Enthusiasm: The Complete Fourth Season and all day Sunday watching sports (specifically soccer and tennis) - for which I just couldn't curb my enthusiasm. Especially when it came to my two new jockette crushes: Brazilian soccer superstar Marta and Chinese tennis star Zi Yan.

Marta is Marta Viera de Silva, a 23-year-old Brazilian beauty and three-time FIFA World Player of the Year who currently plays forward for the Los Angeles Sol of the Women's Professional Soccer (WPS) league. LA, the best team in the WPS all season, lost the championship game this past Sunday to New Jersey's upstart FC Sky Blue (perhaps the most inappropriately named franchise in the WPS - I sure don't think of blue skies when I think of Joisey! It's more a West Coast, "Golden State"-sounding hippy-dippy name) - but not from a lack of effort from gifted goal-scorer Marta who, like all Brazilian soccer stars, goes by a singular sobriquet. But what struck me most about the long-legged Brazilian striker was her bronze-skinned beauty.


Miss Golden Ball: Dear-to-my-hearta Marta

She's a total babe (despite having been named the manly-sounding "Golden Ball" MVP at the FIFA U-19 Women's World Championship), albeit one who can kick you studs-up in your naughty bits if you get on her bad side. Fortunately, Los Angeles Lakers superstar and avid soccer fan Kobe Bryant is on her good side, so good that he's given her free courtside season tickets to Lakers home games (hmmm, I wonder if the roaming-eye hoopster's trying to score some extra added time with her - if so, someone should tell him about the locker room allegations that Marta's secret girlfriend is fellow Sol sister Johanna Frisk, her former teammate at Swedish club Umea IK; in fact, it was even alleged that Marta only signed with LA Sol after they agreed to sign her blondie "best boo" Frisk).


Marta and Frisky: Playing for the "other" team?

Brazilian fans have compared her to all-time soccer great Pele (Edison Arantes do Nascimento), even going so far as to refer to her as "Pele with a skirt" - and she remains the only woman ever to have a cement imprint of her feet immortalized alongside those of the male stars at Brazil's famous national stadium Estádio do Maracanã in Rio de Janeiro. It's easy to see why: she's a superstar (see highlights reel).


Marta highlights reel

Unfortunately, despite all her many talents and accolades, the WPS Championship Game was an all-too-familiar result for Marta.


Unachieved Goals: Marta's Brazil was only second best

Though she won four consecutive regular season titles with Umea IK in Sweden's domestic women's soccer league from 2005-2008, Marta has yet to hoist any post-season trophies other than Sweden's 2007 Svenska Cup and the 2007 U-20 Pan American Games cup. Playing for her national side at the 2004 and 2008 Summer Olympics, Brazil finished second, while the national side was also the runnerup in the 2007 FIFA Women's World Cup.


Marta is the pin-up gal of Nike ads

Though Marta's Brazil lost the Women's World Cup championship game to Germany 2-0, they did beat the US in a game that featured a fantastic Marta goal.


Marta's world-class World Cup goal against the USA

Ah, but there's more to life than futbol and my gal's second favorite sport is none other than tennis...which brings me to Zi Yan.


Yes I Yan! Zi Yan of China

Channel surfing the Tennis Channel, I happened across the doubles final of the LA Women's Tennis Championship, which pitted two Eastern Euro gals - Agnieszka Radwańska of Poland and Maria Kirilenko of Russia - against two Chinese players, Chia-Jung Chuang of Chinese Taipei (otherwise known as Taiwan) and Zi Yan of China.


"Nice Formosa forehand partner!"
Zi Yan (R) compliments Taiwanese partner Chuang


"We've got to stop meeting like this!"
mainlander Yan (L) tells islander Chuang

It was the first ever pairing of the Chinese women, whose partnership accentuated their strengths and offset their weaknesses - namely, Chuang was all serve but no volley and Zi Yan was all volley and no serve (her serve was so bad that she actually double-faulted three times in a love-nothing game in which not a single ball crossed the net!). Their opponents across the net were somewhat similar in their symbiotic relationship, with Kirilenko the steadier server and net player, while baselinner Radwanska had a weak serve (mid-70s mph) but stronger groundstrokes.


We can work it out: Zi Yan and Chia-Jung Chuang
offset each other's weaknesses

Ah, but at the net the tall but slight (5-7, 120 lbs) Zi Yan was a volley monster - pouncing, poaching, and pummeling away anything that came her way with her two-handed forehand and backhand. Despite being shafted when serving for the match at 5-3 by a horrendous umpire's overrule (the umpire thought an unreturnable winning lob on championship point was returnable - even though the Euro babes didn't contest it and had started walking off the court! - and ordered the point replayed), the Chinese duo broke back to take the title 6-0, 6-4, characteristically winning on yet another two-handed passing shot by Yan, who at the net was a veritable Great Wall of China; nothing got past her.


Tall and tan and young and lovely
the girl from Chendu, Sichuan goes walking

Yan's lithe frame and weak serve typifies the problems facing Chinese women's tennis: with the possible exceptions of Li Na and Peng Shuai, the Chinese athletes lack the power to compete in singles with the heavy-hitting Serena Williams and Maria Sharapova's in the top echelon of the sport. That's why the Chinese tennis federation has concentrated on developing competitive doubles teams, where finese and volleying moxie are more important than booming serves and heavy baseline groundstrokes. Yan would have trouble making the cut of most singles tournaments on the women's tour, but as a doubles player paired with someone who can hold serve, she could be a legitimate contender for some more silverware, like the LA Women's Tennis Championship (shown below).


We are the champions!

Previously, Yan enjoyed some success partnering with Jie Zheng, with whom she won the 2008 Medibank International in Sydney, Australia (shown below).


Yan and Zheng raising their cups to success in Sydney

Zheng certainly fits the bill as the type of player Yan partners well with, being a consistent server with good groundstrokes (especially her two-handed backhand), famously reaching the 2008 Wimbledon semifinals - making her the first Chinese women's tennis player ever to reach the semifinals of a Grand Slam singles tournament - after beating then-World No. 1 Ana Ivanovic and two other Top 20 WTA players, elevating her to her highest tour ranking of No. 40.

Of course, on a purely aesthetic level, I love to watch the perky Zi Yan receiving serve, bouncing on her heels and stretching those gorgeous breadstick legs of hers (perhaps the best gams on the women's tour) side-to-side; at moments like this, life is good.


Zi Yan's leg show


Yan's glam gams


Pretty pegs pouncing


A 7th inning-worthy stretch

Speaking of doubles, check out Burhard Bilger's excellent article "Perfect Match" in this week's New Yorker magazine about the Bryan brothers (identical twins Bob and Mike) and the future of the doubles game. It's one of the best pieces of sports writing I've read. It makes the point that in the 70s and 80s, more singles players played doubles (e.g., Martina Navaratilova and John McEnroe) both to make money (prize money was laughably low) and to hone their skills as volleyers and that today's singles players are almost exclusively one-dimensional and cookie-cutter: big servers who power groundstrokes from the baseline. Combined with changes in racquet technology, this has all but killed the serve-and-volley game. The article also makes a great point about how John McEnroe's singles career took a nose-dive in the mid-80s when he stopped playing doubles; he may have been more rested, but what Mac (who never liked to practice all that much) gained in time he ultimately lost in maintaining his sharpness at the net. (Not much, mind you - Mac's a great volleyer still, but it made a difference in terms of titles, for sure.)

Related links:
Zi Yan @ Sony Ericcson WTA Tour

Andy Roddick is a Dick

And other 2009 French Open observations...


Don't worry Andy: Lacoste still loves you

I just finished watching Frenchman Gael Monfils defeat the last "American in Paris," world no. 6 Andy Roddick in straight sets at Roland Garros 6-4, 6-2, 6-3. And I realized that not only is Roddick a loser, and a sore loser at that, but a major dick.

Shock to the System
But first, the shock of the century in terms of tennis: Rafael Nadal lost at the French Open - and not to Roger Federer! No, the King of Clay lost on his favorite surface to a relative unknown in World No. 25, Swede Robin Soderling (how fitting that a fellow Swede protected Bjorn Borg's record of four consecutive Roland Garros crowns from being surpassed by the young Spaniard!). How did he do it? Soderling had a game plan and he executed it perfectly. First, he served big (an essential against Nadal); second, he flattened his forehand and took the ball early so that his volleys and Nadal's serves came back at Nadal fast and harder than Chinese arithmetic - some of those Soderling forehands sounded like skull-crunching Mike Tyson punches to the head (and this was on clay, not hard courts!). This helped keep Rafa pinned behind the baseline and tactically kept him on the defensive. I mean, what's the last time you saw Nadal, who tracks down everything (with authority), flail helplessly at his opponent's shots? Add to that Soderling's natural physical gifts of being tall - which enables him, whenever he doesn't take Nadal's shots early, to adjust and handle Nadal's high-bouncing topspin shots on the baseline - and having a two-handed backhand, which is almost a requirement against Nadal's heavy groundstrokes. Much as I love the one-handed backhand (especially Federer's), it often lacks the ooomph needed to put Nadal on the defensive.

The loss really had to needle Nadal, because he really dislikes Soderling. The world may not know much about Soderling, but Nadal sure does. Remember the ill feelings between the two in the third round of the 2007 Wimbledon tournament? Nadal beat the Swede in five sets in a delayed match that took five days to complete - 6-4, 6-4, 6-7 (7), 4-6, 7-5 - by which time they had seen more than enough of each other to last a lifetime. According to San Francisco Chronicle reporter Bruce Jenkins, Nadal told the Spanish press afterwards: "He's very strange. I say hello to him seven times to his face, he never answers. He hits a lucky shot, he does not wave (the protocol gesture of apology). I thought it was me, but I asked around the locker room and almost nobody has anything nice to say about him. If I fall down, he says nothing. He touches his ass, grabs his pants, makes fun of me - very unprofessional." (To see what ticked off Rafa in that match, check out this video clip of Soderling imitating Nadal.) So, OK, Nadal is out; but so, apparently, is a little class at the French Open. But there's still a pretty classy guy hanging around there...


Federer: Class not yet dismissed

Attention Deficit? Beast of Burden?
With Rafa out of the way, Roger Federer has the most realistic chance of his career to win the French Open title that has eluded him ever since Nadal came to own la terre battue. But Federer isn't the same Jolly Roger of years past; he's mortal now, losing to or being tested by players other than those named Djokovic, Nadal, Murray or his old Argentine nemesis David Nalbandian - people like Radek Stepanek, Giles Simon and Guillermo Canas. It's almost a distraction and a burden for him now. How else to explain dropping two sets against a skillful, but erratic, 31-year-old Tommy Haas? Still, Federer being Federer, with a Will To Triumph and a mental toughness matched only by Rafa Nadal, Roger came back from a 30-40, 3-4 third set deficit to reel off nine straight games and a 5-set win over a mentally deflated Haas and advance to a quarter-final match against the player he beat in last year's semi-final, French favorite Gael Monfils...

...who defeated last American hopeful Andy Roddick in straight sets in the fading light of Suzanne Lenglen Court at Roland Garros.


Monfils: Long 'n' lean retrieving machine

Paris: City of Lights...and Lightweights
I watched this match, and while, yes, the light was fading and Andy complained about it, it's funny how his supposed inability to "see" the ball didn't affect his opponent's ability to see the ball. Apparently, it was only dark on Roddick's side of the court. Hmmmm, it didn't seem to alter the quality of play at last year's Wimbledon final - you know, the Federer-Nadal final that's been called the match of the century. What I'm leading up to, of course, is the point of view I've had for years about the brash Texan with the big serve: he's a dick. Fellow Texan George W. Bush was called a Cowboy Diplomat, and I see Roddick's game as nothing but Cowboy Tennis. Big rocket serve, big crushing forehand, nothing else. All shock and awe. He's never added to that arsenal. Though he's been through a slew of coaches who've worked on improving his backhand (the one-handed slice backhand just doesn't work for him) and on encouraging him to come to net (he only seems to do it when he's down and panicking - and he still looks pretty awkward there), it's never happened. Because he's a stubborn Texan, like George W. If he can't win with power and bullying his opponent around the court, he's just not interested. He gets flustered, hot, and bothered.

And that's what he came up against in French super-athlete Gael Monfils. World no. 10 Monfils isn't much of a tactician, and I think he lacks mental toughness outside of his comfort zone (which is Roland Garros), but the guy can outrun just about anyone on the tour not named Rafael Nadal. He gets to everything. In fact, he used to wear himself out by trying to retrieve EVERYTHING his opponents threw at him. But he's noticeably muscled up his stringbean physique of late and grown mentally tougher as well. He nullified Roddick's serve (Monfils actually out-aced Roddick, if you can believe that!), and basically forced Roddick to hit more than one or two shots on his service games. That means volleying, and Roddick doesn't like long volleys because they require him to think and not just wail away at the ball and try to blow his opponents off the court. Monfils being a grinder, that forced Roddick into a lot of unforced errors and lost service games. Plus, well, Monfils has a beautiful touch at the net; some of those angled drop shots recall McEnroe back in his heyday, artistic strokes worthy of a Left Bank painter.

Oh, almost forgot: Monfils also out-bullied the Mighty Mopin' Power Ranger, hitting 45 winners to Roddick’s 18 and 17 aces to the Rocket Man's 4.

But what really got to me watching this match was listening to how rude and nasty Roddick was. After losing the second set, he yelled at a ball boy, "Yellow drink. I want a yellow drink. GET ME A YELLOW DRINK, GOT THAT!!!" Nice sportsmanship there, superstar. Then he yelled at the French umpire, "Don't tell ME that it's light enough out. I'm the one OUT THERE PLAYING. So don't you TELL ME ANYTHING."

What a total dickhead. When Monfils grinned after watching Roddick once again berate the chair umpire, Roddick shouted at him "You're not that good to get that cocky!" (Ummm, yes he is, Andy - and you're sure not gonna wipe that smile off his face!) And I'm sure Mr. Bluster didn't like Monfils working the decidely biased home crowd. But doesn't Roddick do exactly the same thing back in his house, the U.S. Open. And Andy, as your fellow American redneck Kid Rock would say, "You think I'm cocky, and I say 'What?'/It ain't cocky motherfucker if you back it up." Unfortunately, Roddick's mouth is just like his on-court game: all bullying power with no subtlety. He's got one U.S. Open title and nothing else since to back it up. Besides, if he won this match, he'd have had to face Federer, who's 18-2 lifetime against the brash baseliner. So go gently into the night Andy - and shut up or back it up. If not with results, then with class, like Roger.

Alas David Foster Wallace...

I Hardly Knew Ye (and That's My Loss)


The world lost a bright light in David Foster Wallace

I read the New York Times obit (by photographer/filmmaker Bruce Weber) and appreciations yesterday about the apparent suicide of this apparent genius writer at age 46 and was fascinated. Not because he had suicidal tendencies - many authors and artists-in-general are clinically depressed (see William Styron, Hemingway, John Kennedy Toole, etc.). But when I read about how he was an avid tennis fan who was once a regionally-ranked junior tennis star, I was intrigued (being an avid tennis fan myself) - in the same way my only interest in seeing the documentary Metallica: Some Kind of Monster is to learn more about drummer Lars Ulrich's pre-musical career as a tennis player. So, working at a library, I decided to seek out his non-fiction works (since his most famous novel Infinite Jest runs over 1,000 pages and I have textbook AADD, I ruled out reading that book fast!)

One of the first things I found was his 2006 New York Times piece on Roger Federer, "Federer As Religious Experience." It was brilliant, the best appreciation of the Swiss master's skills I had ever read. In watching Federer play, Wallace saw the same kind of beauty Michelangelo realized in sculpting his David:

Beauty is not the goal of competitive sports, but high-level sports are a prime venue for the expression of human beauty. The relation is roughly that of courage to war.

The human beauty we’re talking about here is beauty of a particular type; it might be called kinetic beauty. Its power and appeal are universal. It has nothing to do with sex or cultural norms. What it seems to have to do with, really, is human beings’ reconciliation with the fact of having a body.

Of course, in men’s sports no one ever talks about beauty or grace or the body. Men may profess their “love” of sports, but that love must always be cast and enacted in the symbology of war: elimination vs. advance, hierarchy of rank and standing, obsessive statistics, technical analysis, tribal and/or nationalist fervor, uniforms, mass noise, banners, chest-thumping, face-painting, etc. For reasons that are not well understood, war’s codes are safer for most of us than love’s.

Further research led me to two of his non-fiction collections, Consider the Lobster, and Other Essays (2006) - which contained a piece about Tracy Austin and the "sports biography" - and A Supposedly Fun Thing I'll Never Do Again: Essays and Arguments (1997), which had a superlative profile on Mike Joyce entitled "Tennis player Michael Joyce's professional artistry as a paradigm of certain stuff about choice, freedom, discipline, joy, grotesquerie, and human completeness."

Now I've read every book ever written about tennis and I am here to attest that David Foster Wallace was the best writer on the subject I've ever encountered. He "got it" as only a handful of writers ever came close to "getting it" (e.g., John Feinstein in Hard Courts or Eliot Berry in Topspin). Or, in his own words:

I submit that tennis is the most beautiful sport there is, and also the most demanding. It requires body control, hand-eye coordination, quickness, flat-out speed, endurance, and that strange mix of caution and abandon we call courage. It also requires smarts. Just one single shot in one exchange in one point of a high-level match is a nightmare of mechanical variables. Given a net that's three-feet high (at the center) and two players in (unrealistically) a fixed position, the efficacy of one single shot is determined by its angle, depth, pace, and spin. And each of these determinants is itself determined by still other variables - for example, a shot's depth is determined by the height at which the ball passes over the net combined with some integrated function of pace and spin, with the ball's height over the net itself determined by the player's body position, grip on the racquet, degree of backswing, angle of racquet face, and the 3-D coordinates through which the racquet face moves during that interval in which the ball is actually on the strings. The tree of variables and determinants branches out, on and on, and then on even farther when the opponent's own positions and predilections and the ballistic features of the ball he's sent to you are factored in. No CPU yet existent could compute the expansion of variables for even a single exchange - smoke would come out of the mainframe. The sort of thinking involved is the sort that can only be done by a living and highly conscious entity, and then only unconsciously, i.e., by combining talent with repetition to such an extent that the variables are combined and controlled without conscious thought. In other words, serious tennis is a kind of art.

The physics behind the art of tennis

And it was an art that Wallace rightly concluded was best appreciated live, as "television doesn't really allow us to appreciate what real top-level players can do - how hard they're actually hitting the ball, and with what control and tactical artistry." (God knows I can appreciate that observation. Just this past weekend I was playing tennis on some nearby public courts when former Dark Side bass player Dave Jarkowski strolled in with his 15-year-old son Eric Jarkowski, and asked if I wanted to hit with Eric. I did, or rather, I tried to. Eric was the Baltimore City boys tennis champion last year - as a Freshman (!) - at Poly High School, and receiving his blazing forehand strokes was like seeing an asteroid hurtling toward me at supersonic speeds. Blink and you missed it. It took a half-dozen tries before I could return one measly ball over the net to him!)

I also have read just about every book written on the adult film industry (needless to say, I have divergent interests), so I was doubly pleased to read the opening essay, "Big Red Son," about the Annual AVN (Adult Video News) Awards at the 1998 Consumer Electronics Show (CES) in Las Vegas, which was described as "the Apocalypse [taking] the form of a cocktail party.". It was a spot-on piece of reporting, Hunter S. Thompson with gravitas. Here's a sample:

The adult industry is vulgar...The industry's not only vulgar, it's predictably vulgar. All the cliches are true. The typical porn producer really is the ugly little man with a bad toupee and a pinkie-ring the size size of a Rolaids. The typical porn director really is a guy who uses the word class as a noun to mean refinement. The typical porn starlet really is the lady in Lycra eveningwear with tattoos all down her arms who's both smoking and chewing gum while telling journalists how grateful she is to Wadcutter Productions Ltd. for footing her breast-enlargement bill. And meaning it. The whole AVN Awards weekend comprises what Mr. Dick Filth calls an Irony-Free Zone.

Irony-free vulgarity at the AVN Awards

Reading all the obits, I realize (all too late) that I must read his books which, thanks to an prodigious-to-the-point-of-exhaustive work ethic, are plentiful. As Sam Anderson wrote in New York magazine:

"He was the great enemy of word limits, proportion, and journalistic restraint. He aimed, in every single project, for the grand totalizing exhaustive gesture — whether it was a 1,000-page novel seeking to catalogue an entire culture (Infinite Jest) or a 100-page "experiential postcard" recounting a week on a cruise ship ("A Supposedly Fun Thing I'll Never Do Again"). For Wallace, a thought could never actually, in good conscience, realistically, be finished — there was always one more reversal, one more qualifying clause, and an honest writer had to follow them out. Hence the famously never-ending sentences that spun off, even more famously, into never-ending footnotes. The black hole of his self-consciousness drew everything into it, even and especially self-consciousness itself. But that compulsion to be exhaustive was, apparently, exhausting."

It's ironic (and David Foster Wallace apparently hated Irony!) that it took a death to make me take notice of the man once considered by his peers to be America's greatest living author. Sign of the times?

Related Links:
Wikipedia
New York Times Obit (Bruce Weber)
"Exuberant Riffs On a Land Run Amok" (Michiko Kakutani)
"The Genius of David Foster Wallace and the Ugly Monster of Depression" (Baltimore Sun)
New York Magazine Obit (Sam Anderson)

Who's Laughing Now?

Joke-a-vic Spoils A-Rod's Punchline

Some people just can't take a joke. Novak Djokavic is one of them (pictured at left, not laughing). Picking up where sore loser Tommy Robredo left off, world no. 8 Andy Roddick had a little fun mocking the third-ranked Djokovic's injury woes (he called the trainer to address back and ankle injuries during his five-set win over Robredo in the Fourth Round of the 2008 U.S. Open) at a press conference leading up to last night's match between the two. Asked about Djokovich's sore ankle, this exchange transpired:

Roddick: Isn't it both of them? And a back and a hip?

Reporter: And when he said there are too many to count ...

Roddick: And a cramp.

Reporter: Do you get a sense right now that he is ...

Roddick: Bird flu.

Reporter: A lot of things. Beijing hangover. He's got a pretty long list of illness.

Roddick: Anthrax. SARS. Common cough and cold.

Asked whether he believed all the injuries...

Roddick: If it's there, it's there. There's just a lot. You know, he's either quick to call the trainer or he's the most courageous guy of all time. I think it's up for you guys to decide."

Turns out the joke was on Andy as the Djokerman spoiled A-Rod's punchline in four sets, 6-2, 6-3, 2-6, 7-6 (7-5). I have a lot of problems with Roddick, both with his game and his attitude. First off...

Here's the thing about injuries, Andy. You get them from playing a busy tour schedule, not by "resting up" for the U.S. Open. You see, Roddick was the only Top 10 tennis player in world to skip the Olympics, opting to rest up for his vanity project, the U.S. Open - incidentally, the only Grand Slam he's ever one, though it was way back in 2003. Selfish? Of course - he chose personal glory over representing his country at the Olympics. I know, I know - he's the most consistent Davis Cup player and Patrick McEnroes loves him and all that jazz, but this was a major miscalculation.

Moreover, what should have been a walkover at the tune-up Legg Mason Tennis Classic tournament in Washington, D.C., turned into an embarassment, as Roddick lost to Viktor Troicki - not just another Serb, but a B-list one at that (world ranking no. 71). Only then did Roddick question his Cowboy Diplomacy, fire his brother as coach and hire patrick McEnroe in a panic to get him prepped for the Open. But it was all downhill from the moment he made the poor decision to wear that hideous Lacoste shirt - the worst clothing at the U.S. Open this year. That black bumble-bee Lacoste ensemble (officially known as the "Short Sleeve Tennis Super Dry Stripe Polo with Zip") was just ridiculous-looking, too aggressively preppy for my taste. Good thing that it was specially made for Roddick and unavailable in that color for the masses. (The best kit was easily Marty Fish's burgundy K-Swiss Primacy Crewneck, which reminds me of FC Barcelona's soccer logo and colors).

And while I'm harping on A-Rod, let me just add that his fiancee has a dumb, trendy name. C'mon now, Brooklyn? (Isn't that what Posh Spice and her tattooed love boy Becks named one of their progeny?) That's like Djokavic having a girlfriend named Belgradia. It guess it could be worse - at least she's not named Yonkers! But what kind of parents name their daughter after New York City's reigning bastion of Yuppiedom? Rich ones, I reckon.

As the blogger at The Spoke put it, "Brooklyn Decker has the legs of a runway model, the body of a swimsuit model, and the face and hair of your local trailer trash lady that likes to hang out at 7-11 while drinking her big gulp...Fortunately for Brooklyn, only 2 of the above said things really matter." And speaking of big gulps, check out her cups-runneth-over picture below:


Brooklyn: A Match Made in 7-11 Heaven

Anyway, before the U.S. Open, when sports pundits questioned whether Roddick - approaching his 26th birthday at this year's Open - was finished, Roddick angrily retorted: “They said I was through in 2006, which was ridiculous - so I’ve been under the radar before, and responded very big.” This comment was an obvious reference to his runner-up finish to Roger Federer that year in the U.S. Open Final. Then Roddick added, “I know I can compete in the Open, and I know this is the one slam that fits my game. If it wasn’t for a couple of injuries, this would be a different conversation.”

Ah yes, playing the injury card...guess it takes a whiner to know one, right Andy?

Strive For Five

LABOR DAY WEEKEND'S HERCULEAN TENNIS LABORS

Flushing, NY (Saturday, August 30, 2008) - Day six of the U.S. Open featured four Third Round matches in the bottom half the Men's Singles section one draw, and every single one of them went to five sets.


Murray Mans Up in Marathon Match

Britain's No. 6-ranked Andy Murray and Switzerland's No. 10-ranked Stanislas Wawrinka overcame two-sets-to-nil deficits to claim victory Saturday, Murray showing the stamina that comes with improved fitness in overpowering Austrian Juergen Melzer 6-7 (5-7), 4-6, 7-6 (7-5), 6-1, 6-3 on the Grandstand court, while Wawrinka - fresh off winning 2008 Olympic Gold in Doubles with fellow compatriot Roger Federer - outlasted Italian Flavio (what a great name!) Cipolla 5-7, 6-7 (4-7), 6-4, 6-0, 6-4 over on Court 11.


Stan the Man survives Flavio of the Month

Later, Argentine teen Juan Martin del Potro outlasted Frenchman Gilles Simon 6-4, 6-7 (4-7), 6-1, 3-6, 6-3 on the Grandstand and the 126th-ranked Japanese juvie Kei Nishikori pulled off the upset of the tournament in beating world No. 4 David Ferrer - the Spanish reincarnation of indefatigable retriever Michael Chang - on Louis Armstrong court after almost blowing a two set lead (and a match point serving at 5-3 in the fifth set), 6-4, 6-4, 3-6, 2-6, 7-5.

Quite a lot of labor for Labor Day Weekend - no wonder the young guns are prevailing at this Open (Del Potro is 19 while 18-year-old Nishikori is the youngest player on the ATP tour; earlier, 19-year-old lefty Donald Young lost a 5-setter to fellow American James Blake in the first round). Now five setters take a lot of time - at least three hours and up to five (as anyone who caught the 2008 Wimbleton final between Nadal and Federer - hereafter known simply as "The Greatest Match Ever Played" - knows well). So I was only able to see two of them - the Del Potro-Simon and Ferrer-Nishikori matches.

The Streaker and the Squeaker


Goddamn the Pusher Man: Simon Says "Beat Me"

I had seen Simon, fresh off his Indianapolis Masters win over Dmitry Tursunov, upset Roger Federer in the first round of the Toronto Masters (inexplicably, as Federer seemed to have the match in hand when he was serving for the match at 6-2, 5-4 only to let it slip away 6-2, 5-7, 4-6) and knew this would be a good one. On paper, the opponents certainly looked close - Simon ranked No. 16 in the world and del Potro No. 17. But the slight, 5-10 and 143-pound Simon ultimately didn't have the strength of the 6-5 del Potro who, after Nadal, is the hottest player of the moment on the ATP tour.


Argenteen Del Potro is in the swing of things

Juan Martin del Potro has won 22 straight matches since June - the second longest streak on the ATP circuit behind Nadal's 35 - and four consecutive ATP titles. The most recent title was a 6-3, 6-3 victory over Serbia's Viktor Troicki in the final of the Legg Mason Tennis Classic in Washington D.C.; previously, del Potro captured the Kitzbuhel, Stuttgart, and Los Angeles titles (beating Andy Roddick in the final) and reached the semifinals at Hertogenbosch (as well as the QFs in doubles there with fellow Argentine Canas) and the quarterfinals at Munich. Del Potro's streak is also the longest by a teenager since Nadal’s 24 successive victories in 2005 and the joint third longest in history from an Argentine (Vilas 44, Clerc 28, Vilas 19). Prior to del Potro's winning streak, only one player ranked outside the Top 10 in the last 20 years had won at least 15 consecutive matches - Karel Novacek (15) in 1992. Admittedly, he won two titles on hardcourts while most of the top players were in Beijing... but even a cynic would have to admit the kid's got some game, right?

But Frenchman Gilles had the guiles to match del Potro's athletic wiles on Saturday. Though both men looked winded, especially in the legs, ultimately it was del Potro's power that proved too much for the counterpunching Simon. Del Potro hit an insane number of forehand winners - something like 40 - to Simon's single-digit tally. (Surprisingly, though, Simon out-aced del Potro, like 16 to 9. Go figure.) The only way Simon was going to beat del Potro, as astute commentator Jim Courier pointed out, was by having del Potro beat himself. Sports handicapper Andres Gomez (who picked Simon to win because he thought del Potro was tired from a exhausting tournament schedule), observed:

Gilles Simon is the best “pusher” of the circuit, as he does nothing but return balls to the other side of the court, while expecting for errors from his opponents. Well, this clearly works and Federer, Tursunov, Querrey, Cilic, Soderling and Acasuso were some of his victims on this Summer. Simon is also in a great run, being 14-3 on the Summer hardcourt season, so he has nothing to fear in this match, not even Del Potro's winning streak of 21 matches.

Ah, but sometimes tennis operates on the simplest rules of Darwinian logic: the big and strong guys tend to prevail over the slight finese guys on any given day, even when tired. Case in point today - though del Potro was pushed to the limits of that theory, over the course of three and a half hours, by Simon. A great, exciting, and entertaining match!

The Importance of Being Ernests

OK, after Friday night's impressive loss to the insufferably hyper Andy Roddick (Personal Pet Peeve Disclaimer: I can't stand Roddick's flippant ball toss before his big serves and his constant hat and shirt-tugging - not to mention the fact that he always has to wear his stupid baseball cap, like it's some sort of Linus security blanket!), Latvia's Ernests Gulbis was my favorite new player on the ATP tour. Another 19-year-old rising star, he stands 6-3 and looks like pop star Beck Hansen.


The Importance of Being Ernests: Gulbis and lookalike Beck Hansen

And the Riga Rocket actually outpowered Roddick with forehand winners clocking close to the MPH of Roddick's serves. But it didn't hold up after the first set, with Gulbis losing in four sets to the 2003 U.S. Open champion. Oh, by the time that night match ended, Gulbis and Roddick - both of whom were born on August 30 - turned a year older, so now Gulbis is a 20-year-old prodigy and Roddick an old man of 26. Here's what Wikipedia had to say about Gulbis' style of play:

Gulbis primarily employs an offensive baseline playing style, although is fairly comfortable playing from all court positions. Gulbis' most consistent shot is his forehand, which has been likened to that of American James Blake's for its rapid pace and relatively flat execution; his forehand is taken with a medium swing and with high levels of wrist action, which attributes to the explosive nature of the shot. His arsenal of forehand shots is nearly complete, and thus can be extremely disruptive and turn a defensive position into an offensive one. His running forehand has a slice action, but consistently lands extremely deep in the court, allowing for adequate recoil time to regain court position. Gulbis also has a particularly excellent array of finesse shots, including the high lob and drop shot, both of which he can strike from any position, including from deep in the court. Gulbis' primary weakness is his backhand, which while remaining adequately deep tends to lack variety, unless a particularly advantageous situation presents itself. Gulbis' foot speed is only moderate, although his return of serve is varied and dangerous, particularly on second serves and, due to his height, kick serves. In his televised matches in 2007 and early 2008 his serve would have been described as moderate, but has recently vastly improved in speed and variety, having served out several games with no returns against the incredible returners David Nalbandian and Rafael Nadal. - "Ernests Gulbis" (Wikipedia)

So there you have it about my boy Gulbis, Yesterday's Hero.

Teen Titans

But now I must switch allegiance to Kei Nishikori (錦織 圭, Nishikori Kei), the 18-year-old phenom from Shimane, Japan who I saw blow James Blake off the court when he won his first ATP title at Delray Beach, Florida, back in February of this year.


Kei Nishikori after winning Delray Beach title

If Gulbis resembles pop star Beck, then Nishikori is a clone for Chinese action star Jet Li. Unbelievable resemblance.


Jet and Kei compare their crushing forehands

The classic underdog storyline has David slaying Goliath, but on this day, a giant killer slew David. By defeating Ferrer in five sets (6-4, 6-4, 3-6, 2-6, 7-5) over the course of 3 1/2 hours, Nishikori advanced to the Fourth Round, where he where he will face another teen phenom, Argentina's smoking-hot Juan Martin Del Potro. In doing so, Nishikori became the first Japanese man to advance to the fourth round of a Masters event, and the youngest to do so since Marat Safin in 1998. It was also the first time a teenager has beaten a top five player at the U.S. Open since Bjorn Borg defeated Arthur Ashe in 1973.

But Ferrer certainly didn't make it easy.


Ferocious Fighter Ferrer flicking forehand forcefully

"He started playing great in the third and fourth set," said Nishikori afterwards. "I was tired and my legs were almost cramping, but I tried to think, 'I am playing David; he's No. 4 in the world, and playing five sets with him. I felt, like, kind of happy and [started to] think more positive. That's why I think I could fight through everything."

Tennis is far from popular in Japan, where it is more of a recreational sport. Japanese photographer Hiromasa Mano, covering the match, commented that " "For many people it's difficult to understand and also very long. People have no time to watch."

But a producer at WOWOW, the network with the exclusive rights to broadcast the U.S. Open tournament in Japan, said he was certain that when the ratings are released Nishikori's match against Ferrer would be the highest rated tennis-related program in Japan's history.

It's been quite a long time since Japan has had a talented tennis player to root for. Shuzo Matsuoka, currently a sports broadcaster in Japan, was the last Japanese-born player to win an ATP title (Seoul, 1992), reaching the quarterfinals at Wimbleton in 1995 (where he lost in four sets to Pete Sampras) and achieving the highest-ever ranking of world No. 46 in 1992. Matsuoka is most famous for effecting a rules change for injuries. At the 1995 U.S. Open, he was left writhing in pain on court after being stricken by cramps during his first round match against Petr Korda. From Wikpedia: "The rules at the time meant that Matsuoka would have forfeited the match if he had gotten medical attention, so he was left to suffer until he defaulted for delaying the match. The incident led to a change in the rules of professional tennis to allow players to receive medical treatment during matches."


Shuzo Matsuoka: Don't cramp his style

But Nishikori, who lives in Bradenton, Florida (where he trains at the Nick Bollettieri Tennis Academy and is known there as "Project 45") looks to be the rising star from the land of the Rising Sun.

"He's a very good player, no?" Ferrer told Newsday reporters afterwards. "He's a young player, plays very well and serves really well. [He plays at] a good level."

Lame Lasses

Yup, the Nishikori-Ferrer match was a dogfight, and easily the best match of the day - not to mention the best Japanese match the day (Serena Williams having easily dispatched Japan's Ai Sugiyama earlier in the day). But unfortunately, NBC (or was it USA Network?) saw fit to cut away to the listless, boring, error-prone match on Arthur Ashe court between Russia's world No. 6 Darina Safina and Switzerland's Timea Bacsinszky, which the Swiss Miss blew, 6-3, 5-7, 2-6. USA Network was guilty of pushing the hype in the overrated women's tennis game, as Safina, a potential World No. 1 - following Justine Henin's retirement, injuries to Sharapova, lack of tour commitment (prior to Wimbleton and the Olympics) of the Williams sisters, and the frustratingly inconsistent play of the skittish Serbs, No. 1 Ana Ivanovic and No. 2 Jelena Jankovic - was playing the best tennis of her life coming into this match. But it was a no-brainer to leave this match and go for the big show between Nashikori and Ferrer over on Armstrong. Inexcusable!

Let me repeat: the women's game today sucks! The action and the storylines are all over on the men's side. The only reason why I rank Nishikori's win over No. 4 David Ferrer a bigger upset than 188th-ranked Julie Coin's defeat of world no. 1 Ana Ivanovic (6-3, 4-6, 6-3) is that Ivanovic was over-ranked to begin with. On any given day, anyone can beat her. She got her position by default, by a twist of fate and circumstances. Her game is still very immature, in inverse proportion to her gargantuan physical stature. She's still growing into both her body and her game and has worse nerves than chronic head case Amelie Mauresmo, who's mastered the art of snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. Ivanovic rightly scurried off the court in shame following her Second Round come-uppance.

A Final Note: Mulling Over Muller

Now when it comes to snatching victory from the jaws of defeat, I'd be remiss not to mention Gilles Muller's strong early round performances in this post about five setters.


Red Alert: Muller twice rallies from two sets down

The 25-year-old 103rd-ranked Luxembourg native rallied from two sets down to defeat veteran Tommy Hass in the Second Round (2-6, 2-6, 7-6 (7-5), 6-3, 6-3), then repeated the trick on Sunday to move past No. 18 Nicolas Almagro into the Fourth Round by a score of 6-7 (3-7), 3-6, 7-6 (7-5), 7-6 (8-6), 7-5. Like Nishikori, he's the first man or woman from his country to get that far at a Grand Slam event. But Muller remains most famous for his First Round upset of Andy Roddick in straight sets here back in 2005. That was also the year the 6-5 giant killer beat Rafael Nadal at Wimbleton. It's been hard times ever since for the lanky Luxembourg lefty, who despite being the 2001 junior U.S. Open Champion, has still never won an ATP title.